Some of the things we do have unforeseen consequences, little almost tiny happenstance can precipitate much more than we might ever anticipate. What we think is happening may be completely wrong.
Life has a funny way of throwing us curve balls.
For example, I completely misread a situation. Way back when I used to do personal development courses for Ph.D. students, things used to be fine whilst I was still an academic. After I packed in my job, I no longer had the same gravitas simply because I had renounced something to which many of them were aspiring. The whole basis of my credibility shifted. I was no longer a part of that system and therefore had no power. I was the same person but by change of association my effectiveness was reduced. I had never anticipated this, yet it happened. I was suddenly suspect.
I never imagined that one fine morning out walking I would be “told” that this is my last lifetime ever, here on Earth. What do you do with that kind of shit? Does it make you special? If it is true and you read up on that kind of stuff, there are implications. It means that I no longer have a causal vehicle, so I will not cause a subsequent incarnation. I don’t glow in the dark, there is no halo. I still eat and shit.
Way back when I was involved with a high technology start up my prime motivation was to perhaps raise sufficient money to open a retreat centre in which I would be the vegan chef. I doubt anybody thought this was my motivation, but it was. As it happened, I did organise a number of retreats around the same time. The night we pitched and raised a lot of cash, the others celebrated. I went and picked up a minibus in order to drive a whole bunch of people to deepest darkest Pembrokeshire the next day. So, I went from venture capital office to hippy retreat centre in less than 24 hours. We spoke suited and booted to representatives of Rothschild and Weinstock one day, the next day I was organising the meal rota, smoking roll ups in my tatty track suit bottoms.
Theun asked me did I think we raised the five million, I said probably, yes. His face was a picture, he had not seen that one coming.
I was convinced that my future lay with the Toltec teachings as a leader of a largely sixth ray group, they would not follow my lead, there was infighting and a power struggle, so I left. At the time I did not realize that I was an Elephant and not a Wolf. Then I started having flashbacks and visual overlays of my two Buddhist incarnations, feeling om mane padme hum tattooed in Sanskrit on your forearms is a bit odd, feeling a monk overlay walking on Brixton high street is weird. What does one do with that kind of shit? Well one largely keeps it a secret. Nobody prepared me for this kind of thing.
Unless there is yet another strange quirk of fate, some other unexpected event, I will probably eke out the rest of my life as a retired Welsh geezer on a small stipend, gardening and doing DIY. That is what it looks like this morning.
But you never really know, life has a funny way of throwing us curve balls.