The Illusion of Control

Do you control your own fate, your destiny?

Are you in control of the direction of “your” life?

It seems to me that many get mightily upset when things don’t go “their” way.

I remember having a conversation with our French teacher prior to Brexit being “done” and perhaps “dusted”. I said that the whole story / drama / endless saga about fishing rights would drag on way after any “agreement” was made. She and I agreed that this was likely to be the case.

It was so foxtrotting obvious!

{Don’t worry Boris it is just a detail. They are never important when you can build a bridge from Scotland to Norway, using imaginary money which you just don’t have.}

There is no such thing as a binary clean-cut divorce without some ill-will and rankling. The British press are suggesting that the French are sulking, and the French are saying that perfidious Albion is being just as perfidious as ever. You cannot cut with a knife without at least leaving some scar tissue.

We may like to think that we have our shit together, are clever and cunning, and are driving our lives towards the imagined nirvana of our goals and ambitions. But life has a whole bunch of spanners, curve balls etc. in its back pocket which it can at any time unleash. Fate has a whole rucksack full of quirks.

I used to have a trick to demonstrate this a little to groups I was facilitating. On one side of flip chart paper, I had:

“When God sees humans making plans…”

I would ask people to comment on this, it often solicited some strange reactions. Most people would refer to God as He. “If He exists blah, blah…”

On the next piece of paper, it said:

“She laughs…”

When I revealed this there was usually a very mixed reaction, I had deliberately thrown a cat amongst the pigeons as a facilitative manoeuvre.

The upshot of this was that any group I was facilitating realised that I was a stranger fish than they had at first estimated. Boring science dude might be a bit weirder than quantum mechanics.

Right now, people are getting flooded, houses are being swallowed by lava or destroyed by bush fires, “cuddly” polar bears are dying, people in Madagascar are starving, the Lebanon is in dire straits, Haiti is up shit creek without a paddle and Biden is talking to the head of the biggest paedophile organisation this planet has ever known. And the French and the British are arguing about foxtrotting fish and scallops. Squabbling siblings with a love-hate relationship…

You can buy Bulldog cushions here in France and posters of Provence in the UK.

And Greta is Rick-Rolling us…

We foxtrotting deserve it…

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Do you control your own fate, your destiny?

Are you in control of the direction of “your” life?

We’re no strangers to love

You know the rules and so do I

A full commitment’s what I’m thinking of

You wouldn’t get this from any other guy

I just wanna tell you how I’m feeling

Gotta make you understand

Never gonna give you up

Never gonna let you down

Never gonna run around and desert you

Never gonna make you cry

Never gonna say goodbye

Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

—-

We’ve known each other for so long

Your heart’s been aching but you’re too shy to say it

Inside we both know what’s been going on

We know the game and we’re gonna play it

And if you ask me how I’m feeling

Don’t tell me you’re too blind to see

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Foxtrot Foxtrot Sierra